Tomorrow She’s Nine…and Still a Rape Survivor
Tomorrow, she’s nine.
On September 26, 2012, I started my day in my doctor’s office taking a fetal stress test. It was 8:45 AM and I was grossly pregnant. The stress test went without a hitch and by 10:15 AM, I was on my way to the hospital. They triaged me and I was in a room by 11:30 AM. I asked the nurse what time my OR was scheduled. She told me 1:00 PM. I watched X-Men, at 12:30 PM they were prepping me for surgery. I was in the room and ready by 1:00 PM and my second child was born at 1:48 PM. All 5 pounds, 6 ounces of her came into this world… and my life changed for the better.
Right now, it seems like such a blur. Through immunizations and diaper changes, first days of school and honor roll assemblies, Celeste has only enhanced what my role as a mother actually is. She’s loving, kind and selfless…she chooses every day to make the world a better place than she found it. That’s why every day, my heart drowns in guilt and sadness that each day she’s fighting the circumstances of her life. She’s battling the demons that surround something that never should have happened to her — a horror that no moral person would wish on any enemy, where adults in positions of power failed her miserably and set her life on a path with the possibility of no return.
What am I talking about here? Here is the short version of a very long story. In March of 2020, right before the schools let out for pandemic leave, I found out that my dear Celeste had been repeatedly raped at her elementary school. That’s right — you read this correctly. She was RAPED OVER AND OVER AGAIN BY ANOTHER STUDENT FOR THE BETTER PART OF TWO SCHOOL YEARS. The principal at John Tyler Elementary School (now Mary Peake Elementary School) in Hampton, Virginia called me to tell me a fact that has rocked me to my core. I was sitting on my bed in sweatpants when my phone rang and every confidence I had in the school system that I am a product of went out of the window. The principal couldn’t tell me who it was, but by the description he was able to say, I knew. And when I confirmed this with my Celeste, my heart shattered into a thousand pieces. The school seemed to show concern. They told me I could keep Celeste out of school to give her time to decompress. We found out on a Monday, I kept her out of school that Tuesday through Friday, and the next Monday, the entire district closed due to the COVID pandemic. That leave admittedly was a blessing in disguise in some ways. It was also the start of the nightmare that is continuing present day.
Most parents in a situation like mine would be ready to arm up and set the school on fire, and don’t think that those thoughts didn’t go through my mind. At the end of the day, however, objective heads needed to prevail to make sure that my daughter was safe. The day that I found out about this, I had a conversation with Ann Stephens Cherry, the chairman of the school board. She seemed empathetic and stated that after she talked to me, she was contacting Dr. Jeffrey Smith, the superintendent of schools and that I should be receiving several calls from the district to do what was needed to make sure Celeste was safe. I’m not a passive bystander in my community — I serve in various capacities and am extremely civically engaged. So when Ms. Stephens Cherry told me I’d be contacted, I believed her. It’s been nineteen months since my family was informed of this tragedy. For nineteen months, the people who used to be so quick to ask for my help and who would smile in my face have been doing everything in their power to avoid me. Ann Cherry. Jeffrey Smith. Richard Mason. When speaking to Dr. Mason at a community event, he wouldn’t even acknowledge he knew who I was. “I’ve seen your face, and I know your story.” Then this dude gave me this Cheshire cat smile as if he was campaigning for my vote. It took everything in me to not spit in his face, but again, what would that have solved. I chose to bite my tongue until blood was literally seeping out and continue the good fight.
The road has been hard. Nanci Reaves, the school board general counsel and resident idiot of the district, thought that our family should be satisfied with extra time with the guidance counselor. My requests were simple: move Celeste to the school of our family’s choice, ensure that Celeste and her rapist never be in the same school again and that my daughter be given priority, and pay therapy costs for Celeste and myself as her support. I have a “Me Too” past. Looking in the eyes of my baby, an eight-year-old rape survivor, has hurt me in places that I didn’t think hurt could penetrate. The cost to cover both of our therapy is $120 a month. $15 a week times two. Nanci Reaves and the school boards gave us ZERO for THREE. Each school we asked her to be moved to, the answer was no. They offered to move her to a school that had worse test scores than the school she was at and expected us to be satisfied. I hired an attorney to handle the more exploratory aspects of our case. Through the two of us, we were able to get my daughter moved to a new school. Hampton City Schools had NO MOTIVATION to even transfer my daughter to a new school so that she wouldn’t be faced with where she was REPEATEDLY RAPED. Through the kindness of the office manager at my daughter’s new school, we were able to get her moved DESPITE the roadblocks that Hampton City Schools put in our way. And then the pièce de resistance? TWO WEEKS after my daughter had been moved to a new school, Nanci Reaves reaches out to my attorney and offers to push the request to move Celeste along the pipeline. TWO WEEKS. Her lazy, inconsiderate and heartless ass didn’t even have the motivation to look into the school computer to verify where Celeste was enrolled so she could confirm that her ill-intended gesture was pointless at this juncture in time. Each moment that Hampton City Schools spit in my face, I wiped the phlegm off of my cheeks and pressed forward. That’s what a mother does….
I was informed by the guidance counselor at John Tyler that my daughter’s rapist had been suspended for ten days and recommended for long-term suspension or expulsion. Then, COVID happened and everything changed. My daughter’s rapist was out of school for FIVE DAYS, then they let her back into REGULAR PROGRAMMING. Yep, you read that right. And the biggest insult? My Celeste was looking online to see if her cousin had made honor roll, and sees this child’s name on the list for an award. “Mommy, (insert rapist’s name) is back at Tyler.” “that’s not true.” “Mom, she’s (yes, it was a SHE) back at Tyler.” “How do you know this?” Celeste then shows me the website and the “Ain’t THIS a BITCH” came out of my mouth. Then, a TWO WEEK long series of panic attacks exuded from my child. “Mommy, what’s going to keep her from coming to my new school? What’s going to keep her from coming to my middle school? What’s going to keep her from coming to my high school?” In that moment of vulnerability, I had no answers for her. That’s when the demand of Hampton City Schools changed. Private education was the only way to ensure Celeste’s safety. Then to add insult to injury, my daughter’s rapist was in the same classroom as my daughter’s cousin and the teacher had NO IDEA of what happened in the bathrooms of the school where she taught. It took our cousin’s mom to say something to her in order for her to be informed. The teacher was at a major disadvantage to protect the children in her classroom. She couldn’t put safeguards in place to make sure that this student wasn’t following other kids like she did my Celeste. She couldn’t even make sure that she went to the bathroom by herself. If the levels of disappointment aren’t reflected in my words, please feel them at this moment. My heart is so broken and tired that it’s almost impossible to convey.
How many balls were dropped? First, the school system and their nonchalance in protecting little girls from being raped in the bathrooms. Then, the Commonwealth Attorney’s office. Anton, Bell, the Commonwealth Attorney, chose not to prosecute my daughter’s rapist because of her age. Don’t get me wrong — what needed to happen in this circumstance was COURT-ORDERED THERAPY and separation from the regular student population until there was an assurance that her predatory behavior has been somewhat controlled. But Anton Bell didn’t give a damn about what I thought. I didn’t get a phone call, an email or a smoke signal from his office even to acknowledge my daughter and this horrid situation. When asked by WAVY-TV 10 for comment, he stated that the detective that conducted the investigation didn’t have the right to say there was probable cause to charge this girl with a crime. His ego exuded from his words like tree sap. His response was on baseline offensive to my family. To this day, he still hasn’t had the moral conscience to speak to my family. To me, that is a failure on his office and himself to even show minimal consideration for a victim.
Back to Hampton City Schools - after I chose to go public with this story, Nanci Reaves transferred communication on my daughter’s situation to Richard Matthews at Pender and Coward. Mr. Matthews words?
“Even if your client is seen in the most favorable light, the Hampton School Board and its employees have no liability.”
Sir, do you realize you’re talking about an EIGHT-YEAR-OLD? Then, HOW POMPOUS can you be to say that Hampton City Schools has no liability? If my daughter had been fighting from the point she left my doorstep until she arrived back at my doorstep, she would still be under the school’s jurisdiction, but when she’s REPEATEDLY RAPED ON SCHOOL PROPERTY, the school has no liability? No, sir. NO. Then he stated that the school system would pay for Celeste’s therapy, but not mine AND that if Celeste left Hampton City Schools, they wouldn’t even do that! $15/week. The school system gets THOUSANDS of DOLLARS from state and federal funding, but we are having to fight for $15/WEEK?!?!? Like Nanci Reaves, Richard Matthews didn’t even have the wherewithal to confirm that Celeste was still enrolled in Hampton City Schools (at the time of his statement, she was)
His statement: “I understand that previously the School Board agreed to assist with counseling for the minor plaintiff. This offer was purely a gesture of goodwill, not because of any admission or acceptance of any liability. I understand that the School Board is still willing to assist with that, provided however, that Celeste Miller is enrolled in Hampton Public Schools. I understand that at this point in time that she will not be. Please confirm whether or not she is an enrolled student at the present, particularly if you wish to pursue any assistance in counseling for Celeste.”
$15/week Y’ALL!!! Then Kellie A. Goral, Executive Director of Public Relations and Marketing and FOIA Officer gave a public statement from Hampton City Schools that reduced my daughter’s REPEATED RAPE to “two female students in the second grade who attend different after-school programs met in a girls’ restroom after school hours.” EXCUSE ME?!?!?! You’re reducing my daughter’s REPEATED RAPE as if my daughter and her assailant met in the bathroom to play dominos? HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!?!? The ego and white-centricity of the statements made by people who are acting in their official capacities is ridiculous at best.
My husband and I made the decision to remove Celeste from Hampton City Schools and place her in a private school while litigation is pursued. Because of that, I see a joy in my daughter that I have no seen in eons. She’s confident, she feels safe and she’s thriving. We were able to make that decision even though it’s killing our wallets, but I’m certain that there are other families that are dealing with similar situations in Hampton City Schools that don’t have the luxury to do what we did. Many families can’t afford private school. I mean, hell — honestly, we can’t either. But we are making it work. Since I’ve created the Justice for Celeste Facebook group (www.facebook.com/groups/8forCeleste), I’ve talked to five mothers and a teacher who have either witnessed or had children who have been assaulted in Hampton City School. This is a travesty of monumental proportions. How many children have to be sexually assaulted in Hampton City Schools for them to think that there is a systemic problem? HCS spent $150,000 to rename five schools from names connected to the Confederacy or racism — $30,000/school for signage and letterhead — but $120/month was too much? In my opinion, the priorities of Hampton City Schools are warped and the only people hurt are our children. I can say “our” because I still have two children in Hampton City Schools. I won’t stop fighting until EVERY CHILD, EVERY DAY, WHATEVER IT TAKES is safe and in a place where they can learn without looking over their shoulders.
So today and on September 26th, remember my daughter. Join our group, sign our petition, say a prayer — whatever you can do — to honor Celeste for being amazingly strong and resilient in the face of immense adversity. Honor her for continuing the fight that no child her age should be labeled — a brilliant, beautiful, tough, nine-year-old rape survivor.
